City Faceoff Begins.

 The City Faceoff

By the Hat

In every election, there comes a moment when every moderate becomes a hardcore partisan, where the objection party loses–and gains–millions of followers, and when every hope of the inexperienced parties is shattered. It is the City Faceoff. A coin is flipped, each candidate receives governorship of a city for a month, and the election is decided afterwards. The numbers are carefully calculated, and everyone in those cities are required to take a poll every three days, or risk higher taxes. These polls also document satisfaction with the government, net worth, employment status, and much more.

Whoever ruins their credentials, and their city, has practically no chance of winning the election. This has happened before, many times. The most extreme example is when Eriliniland was invaded due to one Objectionist. What happens is simple. Each candidate is appointed a city, and we decide who ran it the best. As such, this gives voters an opportunity to learn more about the policies of new candidates.

The coin, a famous Gold Dragon from about seven hundred years ago, was flipped twice. The first flip was whether Bear/Zebra should get Port City/Waterfall's throne, or whether it should be Mr. Nekro/Oscar. The result was Bear/Zebra. The next flip decided whether Bear would get the Waterfall's throne or Port City. He got the Waterfall's throne, which gave Zebra Port City, probably the worst thing they could have done. The next toss was who should get the Savanna, Mr. Nekro or Oscar. It was Mr. Nekro. Oscar was left with only the Circle of Villages.

Bear has already implemented more than fifty tax reforms, abolished the so-called people's treasury, and diverted funds to law enforcement. Mr. Nekro and Oscar have done practically nothing. Zebra has banned law enforcement, abolished taxes, and given away millions and millions of cavern coins away for free. He has then proceeded to implement all his idiological policies, including encouraging people to stay at home, and requiring businesses to hire people who do so. Most businesses, and no small amount of people, have moved out, as a precaution. Other people have withdrawn from society, and many people are currently refusing to accept cavern coins anymore in Port City, using foreign currencies instead. Some people are receiving handouts from Port City, then traveling north, to better places.

Here are our predictions:

1. Bear, due to his effective policies, will be successful in the Waterfall's Throne. He will receive a proportional bump in the polls.

2. Mr. Nekro may receive a slight, almost imperceptible decrease in the polls, due to his inabilities to do anything.

3. Oscar the ostrich will have little change in polls. His whole base was based on Objectionism.

4. Zebra will absolutely destroy Port City, making it far less significant, and a burden to our country. He will drop very, very low in the polls.

Different news agencies have reported this differently. The Tobyland Times has said that "Mr. Nekro shows the country the safety and stability that will occur under his rule." and "Here is how Bear's policies will affect you [Negatively]"

The Eriliniland Chronicle has said "Bear consolidates power in the Waterfall's Throne. He is trying to implement sustainable policies, for the benefit of the nation."

The Curiousitiquer has said "Bear absolutely DESTROYS rumors that he is unfit to run a country! GO BEAR!"

The Object Paper has said, "We object. And so does Oscar."

The Insect Times has reported "Vote Bear. He is friendlier to insects."

The Rodentia has reported, "Bear, and his grandson Porcupine, are the only politicians who even know that we exist."

The Cold-Blooded Facts Magazine has said, "Vote hangs in the Balance."

The Striped Times has said, "I, Zebra, am the best candidate. Please vote for me. Why are you so unfair? Why are you so unkind?

The Pounder-Grounder Times has stated: "You must vote Nekro. If you do not, your grass will not grow, your savannas will be burned by fire, the wet seasons will never come again, and you children will be lost and eaten by hyenas."

The Porvalatian Eriliniland Times has said, "Bear is stupid. And no, we did not receive money from Nekro's lobbyists (who do not exist) to say this."

We will be looking for further updates. Stay posted.