Porcupine Reveals New Military Strategy

 Porcupine Reveals New Military Strategy and History

By the Crown

Porcupine has officially revealed his new military strategy. This includes harnessing all military capabilities of talking animals, such as underground burrowing abilities, flying, and stampeding in herds. Porcupine explained his process of accepting animals into the military. He starts by asking, "what can such and such an animal do? What are they very good at?" He then goes on to ask, "do we have a role for such and such an animal already?" If the answer is no, then he considers making a new position, going through a similar process.

Currently, Porcupine has a vast array of different positions, being the most positioned person in parliament. As the commander in chief of the Unnatural Military, he controls the insect force, the underground force, the undersea force, the intelligence agency (he holds joint jurisdiction with serrate over intelligence) the rodent's military, the joint species military, the siege engine department, and many other positions. He controls by far the most positions, with Serrate (his competitor) coming in second, Zebra coming in third, and the Admiralty coming in fourth.

Porcupine rose to power after being the first candidate for a political office to notice that insects, rodents, and other small animals existed politically. These animals, who normally stayed away from the polls, came and elected him overwhelmingly, making him the first politician under ten pounds to be elected. He focused much of his political office recruiting small animals into the military and finding various way to use them. After his famous Ant Smuggler campaign, in which insects sneaked catapults, wagons, trebuchets, boats, siege towers, and even whole fortresses into Haha land, bit by bit. This made Porcupine the most Loved, the most Hated, the most Targeted, the most annoying, the most encouraging, the most influential, and the most accomplished member of parliament, excepting only the Bear, who is very tricky to surpass.

Porcupine's military strategies, involving a multi-pronged attack on enemies, from east, west, north, south, the sky, the sea, and the ground. He starts by air raids, then opens the earth and caverns, sending in stampedes afterwards.

We will post further updates. Stay posted.