Opinion: We are far superior to the Midnight Dagger

Everyone knows our main competition. That terrifying news source, that publishes misinformation both day and night. They go to our websites and comment aggressively, trolling and generally causing havoc. They come and claim to use facts and logic, when they are actually feeding us propaganda. We, though, are completely factual and unbiased. What else would you expect from the Portvalatvian Times, which always tells the truth?

We are not even talking about other pro-bear sites, such as the Eriliniland Chronicle, or (shudder) the Curiousitiquer. These sites intentionally post misinformation.

Now you might ask, "why do these sites publish so much misinformation?" Simple. Hatred. They hate truth and promote misinformation. This helps their egos, so that they can survive being the less intelligent newspapers.

Here are five solid reasons why we are far superior to the Midnight Dagger:

1. We don't publish Misinformation.

The Midnight Dagger says on their "about us" page, "we do not claim to lack biases, but our biases are well informed and backed by debates and evidence." Do you want a biased or unbiased source? It should be obvious. But, anyway, the Midnight Dagger has failed numerous factchecks. For example, when they said that Man is a Delusion, it was a pants-on-fire lie. They promote that baseless "Lunchtime eagle" urban legend, which has been disproved dozens of times. They have claimed that "Animalary village had more satisfaction per capita than Port City," which is pseudoscience, since the truth is the opposite. They even claimed that "By every metric, Bear is the best candidate," which is thoroughly false. In fact, he is the worst by every metric.  Bear is scientifically, mathematically, linguistically, and grammatically worse than Mr. Nekro. There can be not the smallest shadow of a doubt.

Now some say that the previous statement is biased against Bear. We are not biased. We are stating scientific facts: Bear is bad.

2. We don't troll the comments section

Another obvious one. One of the favorite activities of the Midnight Dagger editorial board, especially The Mantle, is to excessively troll the comments section. This sometimes gets really annoying. We only have one troll, who is not too annoying, and his name is Bearisbad. It is not like he is that annoying. He just... well... comments sometimes. In contrast, the midnight dagger goes on the comments sections, and offers whole analysis articles and refutations, and even invites celebrities to comment on their articles. This has gotten to such an extreme that some people now view comments on the Midnight Dagger as reliable sources! We are not that ridiculous.

3. We don't write under pseudonyms 

Let's be honest. Anyone who knows anything about anything knows that the five members of the Midnight Dagger are no other than the Five Lords of the Admiralty. How else could they have so much inside information? And why do their policies match so closely with the Admiralty? We know that they sometimes criticize the admiralty, but they sometimes criticize themselves. Come to think of it, they have criticized practically everything on the planet. But anyway. We do not have such silly nicknames, but have perfectly reliable names, names that we use in our everyday lives. For example, the name of our Troll-in-chief, Bearisbad, is a perfectly real and normal name. Isn't it?

4. We are far more focused with our posts.

The Midnight Dagger literally focuses on everything under the sun. We, on the other hand, are more sensible, just confining our posts to politics, and specifically the politics of Bear. Some say that that is too limited. They are wrong.

As such, any sensible person will forsake the Midnight Dagger and come and register for our premium posts and give us your money please. And no, we are funded entirely by donations from individuals and not lobbying organizations.